Heart of a Soldier Read online

  Filled with curiosity, she blurted, “Are those your tags?”

  Dylan reached up and lightly fingered the tags, his face contemplative as he answered. “Just one of ’em is mine. The other one belonged to one of my buddies who died over in Afghanistan.”

  Died? He must be referring to Benji, the soldier he’d written about in one of his letters. At only eighteen years old, he’d been among the youngest soldiers in the unit. From what she remembered, he’d been killed instantly when their Humvee had been blown up by a roadside bomb. Dylan had been seriously injured as well, but thankfully had rebounded from those injuries. The attack had occurred before they’d started writing each other, and Dylan was very close lipped about it and his subsequent hospitalization and recovery.

  Cassidy returned with a tray of drinks and some slices of homemade pumpkin bread. Like a perfect hostess, she served the refreshments, then plopped down onto the sofa directly across from Dylan. Holly discreetly watched him as he thirstily downed the contents of the glass. It was almost impossible to tear her gaze away from him. She felt like a starving person sitting down at an all-you-can-eat buffet. Dylan, in all his cowboy/soldier glory was a sight for sore eyes.

  “Horseshoe Bend Ranch is spectacular,” he raved, his eyes wide with admiration. “I can’t say as I’ve ever seen a finer spread.” His tone was filled with awe.

  “It’s the largest and most profitable horse-and-cattle-breeding operation in this part of the state.” The words rolled off Holly’s tongue like quicksilver. She wanted to clap her hands over her mouth to stop herself from inserting herself into the conversation. It wasn’t her place to crow about the family ranch. That might raise a red flag in Dylan’s eyes.

  Dylan grinned at her. “I’m not at all surprised to hear that.” He turned his gaze toward Cassidy. “It must make you feel proud knowing what your family has achieved.”

  “Yes, the Lynches are a hardworking bunch,” Cassidy acknowledged. “It’s impossible not to feel proud of them.”

  Holly flashed a smile in her soon-to-be sister-in-law’s direction. Her best friend was incredibly sweet and loyal. As far as she was concerned, Cassidy was going to be a perfect addition to the Lynch clan. If Cassidy and Tate would only set a date and put everyone out of their misery!

  “So I was thinking you might like to grab a bite to eat in town,” Dylan said, his face full of expectation. “It’ll give us a chance to talk for a spell.”

  White teeth flashed against his sun-burnished skin, causing a little hitch in her heart at the beauty of his smile.

  Cassidy pressed her fingertips against her head. “Dylan, I—I’m not feeling too well.” She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “I’m so happy you stopped by, but I think it might be better if we catch up another time.”

  Dylan’s face fell. He recovered quickly, plastering a smile on his face. “Sure thing. Why don’t I swing by tomorrow. I think I’ll head back to town and grab something to eat. Doc tells me I have a standing invitation at his diner.”

  Dylan stood up, placing his empty glass down on the tray before reaching for his Stetson and resting it against his chest.

  The look on Dylan’s face took her breath away. He looked confused. And crushed. Some of the light went out of his eyes. Holly wanted to wrap her arms around him and soothe his disappointment. Although he appeared to be as tough as nails on the outside, with his rugged appearance and soldier’s swagger, she knew all too well about his tender side. And even though she felt a twinge of annoyance toward Cassidy for going off script, she knew all the blame for this entire fiasco lay at her feet. She’d done this. Her insecurities about believing a man could fall for her had led her down this path. For more than twelve months she’d neglected to tell him her most basic truth. And now it was all unraveling, bit by bit.

  Of course, it had all begun innocently enough. Pastor Blake had started a pen-pal program so the members of Main Street Church could correspond with soldiers serving in Afghanistan. Wanting to show her support for the brave men and women of the armed forces, she’d quickly signed up. From the very beginning she’d felt a connection with the brave soldier from Madden, Oklahoma. They’d shared their hopes and dreams, as well as favorite movies, stories about their pets and best-loved ice cream flavors. She’d shared tidbits with him about life in West Falls and the joys of Horseshoe Bend Ranch, as well as her loving family.

  In turn, he’d described a soldier’s day-to-day life in Afghanistan, the triumphs, the tragedies and the struggles. He’d written her about his wonderful mother, who’d raised him as a single parent. One letter led to another until they were receiving letters from each other on a weekly basis. Somehow, without her even realizing it, Dylan Hart had become a huge part of her life. As the door closed behind Dylan, a feeling of emptiness swept through her like a strong gust of wind. A longing to call out to him, to stop him in his tracks so she could make him stay longer, rose up inside her. After so many nights lying awake, thinking about her green-eyed soldier, it was agonizing knowing she would never be able to face him as Holly Lynch. As much as she wished it wasn’t true, Dylan Hart would forever be out of her reach.

  * * *

  Dylan didn’t know how to explain the feelings roaring through him as he headed out the gates of Horseshoe Bend Ranch. He felt like a deflated balloon. For the life of him, he couldn’t figure out why he felt so disappointed. Holly was gorgeous. Stunning. Any normal, red-blooded man would take one look at her and thank the Lord above for placing her in his orbit. But when he’d finally come face-to-face with her, there had been no kismet, no spark. Nothing special. She hadn’t even seemed stoked to see him.

  Could he have been so wrong about their connection? She’d been much quieter than he’d ever imagined. In her letters, her lively personality had practically jumped off the page. In person, Holly hadn’t been at all as he’d imagined. Something felt off between them. There hadn’t been a feeling of recognition when he met her. Not at all. Not even for a single minute. Although he knew it would take some time for them to adjust to each other, things still should have flowed more effortlessly between them. There had been no attraction, no pull in her direction. And she wasn’t at all like he’d expected her to be. She was skittish and nervous. When he’d moved to pull her into a hug, she’d stood there like a statue, still and unmoving. She hadn’t even hugged him back. She didn’t seem like the Holly he’d gotten to know over the past twelve months.

  And then she’d practically rushed him out the door on the pretext of not feeling well. Not once had she asked about his living arrangements or his four-month rental with Doc Sampson. Truthfully, she hadn’t seemed all that happy to see him at Horseshoe Bend Ranch. Disappointment filled him, leaving him frustrated and full of sorrow. He’d been so sure about Holly, more certain of her than anything ever in his life. Yet now it was looking as if he’d made another gigantic mistake.

  It wouldn’t be the first time, a little voice reminded him. He shook off the memory of his faithless ex-girlfriend, Shawna. It had been a long time since he’d thought about his high school sweetheart, the woman who’d dumped him after his deployment to Afghanistan. After he’d broken his neck and was laid up in a military hospital, he’d been deemed useless in her eyes. He fought against the anger swelling up inside him. There was no time in his life for people who weren’t genuine. And he refused to wallow over past hurts. He had enough scars to last a lifetime.

  Please don’t let me have been so mistaken about Holly. I’ve been so wrong in the past about so many things—relationships, people, situations. Please let me find in her the strong, faithful woman I’ve been seeking. Show me I haven’t traveled all this way chasing a pipe dream.

  Maybe it was just jitters from meeting each other for the first time. It could be that his expectations were way too high. And meeting someone in the flesh was a lot different than writing to one another. She had every right to be ner
vous, didn’t she? Perhaps it just wasn’t meant to be, he realized as a sinking sensation settled in his stomach. Being so misguided about a situation would be a hard pill to swallow. Sometimes one just got a sense of a person—who they were down to their very soul. And for the past year, he’d come to know Holly as a warm and loving, God-fearing woman. Her goodness had resonated in every letter she’d written him and wormed its way inside him, serving as a reminder of everything he wanted in a life partner.

  Try as he might, he just couldn’t shake off the encounter with Holly. There was something bothering him. It was resting right under the surface, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. All of a sudden it hit him. Her eyes. They’d been a vivid green, not blue. Holly had said her eyes were blue. Or was he going crazy? And he’d noticed she was wearing a ring when she’d poured him the sweet tea. Not just any ring, he realized. It had been a diamond ring planted on the wedding finger of her left hand.

  He pulled his truck over to the side of the road, his breathing shallow as he racked his brain for the facts. Had she been wearing an engagement ring? Could he have been wrong about her eye color? No, absolutely not. He remembered the words she’d written him in her letter. I’m a blue-eyed girl from West Falls, Texas.

  He slammed his palm against the steering wheel. What in the world was going on? The woman he’d just seen, the one pretending to be Holly, was a fraud. Her eyes were a spectacular green. That fact, coupled with the odd way she’d been acting and the sparkly ring, was all the proof he needed. With a wild groan, he did a U-turn in the road, his tires spewing dust and rocks as he made his way back toward Horseshoe Bend Ranch. He didn’t know who was trying to make a fool out of him, but he was surely going to find out.

  * * *

  “That did not go so well.” Holly let out a deep sigh. Things had not unfolded the way she’d envisioned. Even though she hated the idea of tricking Dylan, the idea had come to her in a moment of absolute desperation. As an honest woman, it didn’t sit well with her that she’d taken the low road instead of coming clean to Dylan. An overwhelming feeling of fear had held her back. She now felt as helpless as a lamb.

  “Holly, I’m sorry. I tried, but I—” Cassidy grimaced and shook her head. “I just couldn’t pull it off the way you wanted. It didn’t feel right giving him the brush-off.”

  “It’s not your fault. I’m responsible.” Her tone was clipped. She saw the look of dismay on her best friend’s face. She didn’t mean to be so abrupt, but she was feeling so wounded. It hurt to lose the possibility of Dylan. Even though they’d shared secrets and dreams ever since they were kids, she wanted to lick her wounds in private. There was no way Cassidy could ever understand what had driven her to keep her disability a secret. Most able-bodied people wouldn’t get it in a million years. All Cassidy had to do was walk in a room to have all male eyes drawn to her like moths to a flame. Ever since the accident she’d been single. Alone. For eight long years she hadn’t gone out on a date or shared a sweet, tender kiss with a single soul. There had been nobody to hold hands with or catch a movie with at the drive-in. She’d hadn’t received flowers on Valentine’s Day or kissed anyone under the mistletoe. Although she’d felt the stirrings of something with Deputy Cullen Brand, they’d never managed to get out of the friend zone. And considering the fact that he worked closely with Tate in the sheriff’s office, in the long run it might have been a little awkward.

  Becoming Dylan’s correspondent had allowed her a rare opportunity to connect with someone without her physical condition being front and center. Living in a small town like West Falls where everyone knew her whole life story felt limiting at times. And she’d wanted to experience romance. Pure, wondrous romance.

  She’d wanted someone to fall for her without the wheelchair getting in the way. Yes, in retrospect it was selfish of her to withhold the truth, but she hadn’t been able to write those words down on the page. She hadn’t wanted his opinion of her to change.

  Her relationship with Dylan had started out as mere friendship, blossoming into tender, powerful feelings over the course of the past year. Deep in her soul she’d nurtured a fragile hope that he might be the one. She’d never been in love, but she’d hoped to be in a position to fall head over heels in love with Dylan. And to have those tender feelings returned. Now, in light of everything, those dreams had gone up in smoke. She must have been crazy to think this would all work out in the end.

  The sound of whirring tires followed by screeching brakes reverberated in the stillness of the October afternoon. A loud rapping on the front door soon followed. Holly locked eyes with Cassidy before moving toward the front door and slowly opening it. Dylan was standing on the front porch, his handsome features marred by a frown. Holly let out a deep breath. He looked so different now. His face was shuttered. He seemed impenetrable, as if he’d built a wall around himself no one or nothing could breach. The way he was standing—his arms were folded in front of him and his chest was rapidly rising and falling—caused a prickle of awareness to race through her. He looked as if he were ready to take on the world.

  “May I come in?” The grim set of his features was nothing compared to the iciness in his voice.

  Flustered, Holly waved him into the house. All the while her mind was racing. What was he doing back here? And why was his expression so forbidding? Her throat felt constricted, and she didn’t think she could utter a single word if she tried. The sound of his boots echoed sharply against the hardwood floor. He moved toward the middle of the foyer so he was facing both of them.

  Looking back and forth between them, he ground out, “Make no mistake, we need to get something straight. I don’t know what kind of game the two of you are playing with me, but I do know you’re not Holly Lynch.” He jutted his chin in Cassidy’s direction, his eyes blazing with anger. “Are you?”

  Resembling a deer caught in headlights, Cassidy froze, her eyes wide with alarm.

  Holly maneuvered her wheelchair until she was positioned directly in front of Cassidy. She had no intention of making her best friend take it on the chin. She’d started this whole thing, and even though it wouldn’t be easy, facing Dylan was her responsibility. She looked up at him, refusing to lose her courage and look away from his probing gaze.

  Before losing her nerve, she dived right in. “You’re right. She’s not Holly, Dylan. I am.”

  Chapter Three

  “Holly?” His question bristled in the air like a live grenade. The air around them buzzed with electricity.

  “Yes. It’s me, Dylan.” She met his gaze head on, her blue eyes full of intensity.

  A hundred different thoughts were swirling through his mind. His first reaction was a strong sense of recognition. Of course this was Holly. It all made sense now, and even though he’d been thrown off by the wheelchair, there was something he’d instantly recognized in her essence.

  His second reaction was sorrow. His soul shattered for Holly. She couldn’t walk? The same woman he’d been corresponding with for more than a solid year was in a wheelchair. Hadn’t she written him about being an accomplished rider? About wanting a house full of kids one day? What had happened to her? Had this all been a big scam? Thoughts were whizzing through his brain until he felt himself becoming dizzy.

  Confusion covered him like a shroud. His mind went totally blank. Suddenly, he was stumbling around in the darkness without a way out.

  “Why?” His voice came out raspy and uneven. He shoved his fingers through his hair as myriad emotions flitted through him. “Why didn’t you tell me? What is this all about?” The tone of his voice sounded sharp and raised, but he was well past caring about that. It hurt so badly that Holly had tried to trick him. The chocolate Labrador retriever began growling low in his throat, the hairs on his back raised. The dog sat down in front of Holly, acting as a protector.

  “Shush, Bingo. Quiet down,” Holly said in a firm voic
e as she patted the top of his head.

  Cassidy cleared her throat and looked over at Holly, her eyes wide with concern. “Holly. What do you want me to do? Should I stay?”

  Holly met Cassidy’s gaze. She gave her best friend a tentative smile and shook her head. “Go back to the gallery, Cass. I’m sorry I involved you in this.”

  Cassidy glanced back and forth between them, hesitating for a moment before she headed for the door. She pulled it open and cast a lingering glance over her shoulder at the two of them. The look in her eyes warned him to go easy on Holly. The sound of the door clicking closed behind her rang out in the stillness of the foyer.

  The silence that lingered in Cassidy’s wake was painful. Considering written communication between them had always felt effortless, it was an odd sensation.

  “I’m sorry, Dylan. Please don’t blame Cassidy for pretending to be me. It was all my idea. And it’s not something I’m proud of by any means.”

  “Then why’d you do it?” he asked, needing to know what this ruse was all about.

  “When I got your letter today, I panicked,” she admitted. She gestured toward her legs. “Not telling you about my being paralyzed was cowardly. I should have told you in the very beginning, but as time went by, it became harder and harder.” She hung her head. “I should never have kept secrets from you, Dylan. It was wrong of me.”

  “When? How?” He was fumbling with his words. There was so much he wanted to say, to ask, but he still felt out of sorts. He was still reeling from the news. The shock reverberated down to his very core.

  “I was in a car accident when I was eighteen, right after I graduated from high school. My friends and I were playing a reckless-driving game, and I didn’t have my seat belt on. The roads were slick that night, and we weren’t being responsible. Cassidy lost control and hit a stone wall. I was thrown from the car.” Holly’s shoulders sagged. “As a result, I lost the use of my legs.”