An Alaskan Christmas Page 9

  Finn felt himself grinding his teeth. He counted to ten slowly in his head. All this talk of Maggie and Operation Love was irritating. Finn didn’t like the way Hazel was eyeballing him either. She was studying him like he was a biology exam.

  “Let’s leave these young ’uns alone so they can look at the menu. Come help me in the kitchen,” Hazel said to Jasper in a blustery voice as she pulled her husband away from the table.

  Finn felt himself tensing up. The idea of men fighting over Maggie wasn’t a pleasant one. And even though Jasper wasn’t giving up any names, Finn wanted to know who was asking about Maggie. There were a few men in Love who shouldn’t even think about approaching Maggie. He could think of at least five off the top of his head.

  Humph! They didn’t even know her. Her likes and dislikes. Her favorite color. How she liked to spend her downtime. Did they even know she had a son?

  “What’s wrong? You look bent out of shape.”

  “Nothing. I just don’t like the idea of some of these guys swarming over Maggie like bees to honey,” he muttered.

  Declan looked at Finn from over his menu. “Why not? If she finds the man of her dreams, won’t it be a good thing?”

  Finn clenched his jaw. A good thing? Yes. Maggie deserved to find happiness, but he couldn’t deny the unsettled feeling in the pit of his stomach. She was a single mother and a widow who had lived through tragedy. She put on a brave front, but she was vulnerable in many ways. If Finn had anything to say about it, he wasn’t going to let Maggie pair up with just anybody. The guy needed to be as solid as a rock.

  Sophie appeared with two glasses of ice water and placed them down on the table. “I’ll be back in a jiffy to take your order.”

  Finn looked down at the menu, studiously avoiding his brother’s gaze. After what seemed like an eternity, he looked across at Declan, who was still staring at him. Finn let out an exaggerated sigh. “Just say it. I know you want to tell me something, hence the Darth Vader stare.”

  Declan’s lips twitched at the Star Wars mention. “I know you’re into Maggie. You can’t fool me, Finn.” The look on Declan’s face spoke volumes. Sometimes his brother could be like a dog with a bone. He wasn’t going to back down on this topic.

  “Of course I like her. She’s beautiful. And super sweet. You should see her with Oliver.” He shook his head. “She’s wonderful. But honestly, I’m not looking to romance her. I don’t do serious. And I’m certainly not looking for a ready-made family.” He let out a harsh laugh. “Seriously? Can you see me with a wife and a kid?”

  Declan wasn’t laughing. He narrowed his gaze and studied Finn. “Honestly, I can easily picture it, Finn. You’re a good, honest man. You’ve made some missteps in the past, but who hasn’t? You’ve really stepped up in the last year and come into your own. I think it’s time you stopped beating yourself up about it.”

  Finn felt a huge lump in his throat. Declan’s vote of confidence meant the world to him. But there were things his younger brother didn’t know. He had no clue about Finn’s role in their mother’s death and the gradual dissolution of their family unit. Finn’s worst fear was Declan finding out and casting Finn out of his life for good. Without Declan and Annie, Finn wouldn’t have a family. He would be completely alone.

  As Sophie came back to the table to take their order, Finn could barely concentrate on ordering his meal. Fear had grabbed hold of him.

  All of these years he’d managed to keep his guilty secret from Declan. A shudder went down his back at the prospect of Declan finding out the truth about him being responsible for the accident that had killed their mother and the brutal aftermath—his father leaving the family and Killian’s death some years later. Finn had lost most of the people in his life he held dear. He didn’t think he would able to bear it if he lost Declan too.

  Chapter Seven

  As Maggie peered around the thick brown paper still covering the storefront window she saw the gently falling snow. It looked so beautiful and serene. It truly resembled one of those idyllic images from a calendar. From this vantage point she could see the Moose Café, as well as other shops on Jarvis Street. She was counting down the days until they could rip down the paper and Keepsakes could join the other businesses in their holiday cheer.

  Maggie couldn’t remember a time in her life when she had worked so hard toward a goal. With the exception of her first few weeks as a mother to a newborn and the shocking circumstances of Sam’s death, getting Keepsakes ready for business had become the most difficult endeavor in her life.

  On the bright side, the shop was taking shape, and she could see all of the possibilities laid out before her. She had put aside items that she wanted to showcase in the front windows as a holiday display.

  Day by day her friendship with Finn was strengthening. They were beginning to fall into old, familiar rhythms. He made her laugh with his corny jokes and she delighted him with tales of Oliver’s antics. They chuckled over their childhood escapades and the fanciful dreams of their youth. It was nice to be friends with a man without romance messing things up. Although Finn was appealing on so many levels, Maggie couldn’t see herself romantically involved with anyone. Sam had done enough damage to her heart to last a lifetime.

  “You wanted to be a crime fighter,” Finn had reminded her earlier that morning. “I vividly recall you talking about wearing a red cape and riding to the rescue.”

  “You wanted to be a pilot by day,” Maggie recounted with a chuckle. “And a pizza maker by night.”

  “Sounds reasonable to me. Flying and pizza. Two of the finest things in life.” Finn shook his head. “Such goals we had.”

  “We wanted to rule the world,” Maggie said in a wistful tone.

  They had been so innocent back then. At ten years old it had been easy to believe in happy endings and dreams come true. Both she and Finn had been exposed to darkness in their lives. Despite her belief that God hadn’t been by her side through the tough times, Maggie now knew it wasn’t true. He had seen her through the worst of it, and through Uncle Tobias, God had shown her grace and pointed her in a new direction.

  Life tended to provide reality checks along the way. And then she’d had to switch up her dreams, Maggie realized, as she looked around the store. This place was her new dream. A feeling of gratitude threatened to overwhelm her. She’d never really allowed herself to imagine owning anything with such potential. Things were coming together.

  She and Finn had arranged for a garbage disposal company to pick up the items in the shop deemed to be trash. At Finn’s suggestion, they also had a pile of items they were donating to a charitable organization benefiting the homeless. In a few days a crew was coming in to help them give the place a top-to-bottom cleaning. They had a lot of work to do before then.

  “Hey, Maggie.” Finn’s voice interrupted her thoughts. “I’ve been thinking. You’ve been working so hard here at the shop. It hasn’t given you much time for socializing.”

  Maggie swung her gaze up from the front counter. Her mind felt blank. What was Finn talking about? The Operation Love campaign?

  “Socializing?” she asked. It had been so long it felt like a foreign concept.

  Finn chuckled. “Yes. As in getting to know the townsfolk. You’re going to need their friendship and goodwill once the store opens. I’m one hundred percent certain you’ll get their support, but it would be nice to have some established ties.”

  Maggie shrugged. “Well, I have you and Hazel. And there’s Jasper and Declan.” She was counting on her fingers. “And Ruby and Aidan.”

  Finn looked at her without saying a word. He didn’t have to speak. His expression said it all.

  She bit her lip. The town of Love was a small hamlet, but even she knew her numbers were pitiful. When was the last time she’d made an actual friend? Or ventured out of her comfort zone? Moving to Al
aska had been a huge leap of faith, but it would be meaningless if she failed to connect with the townsfolk who lived here.

  So much had been lost over the years, including her ability to connect with people.

  “I did a little brainstorming last night about the grand opening. I think we should think big.” He spread his arms wide. “Huge. We could make up flyers and host a holiday party here with eggnog and red velvet cake and lots of party favors.”

  Maggie smiled. She loved Finn’s enthusiasm. Although it was crystal clear he was working with her in order to get his inheritance, he never hesitated to go the extra mile. He had a great attitude. It was no small wonder Oliver thought he’d hung the moon.

  “That’s a great idea,” Maggie said. She rubbed her hands together. “Who doesn’t adore eggnog?”

  Finn looked at his watch. “I can man the store if you want to head over to the meeting for the carol singers. Pastor Jack would love to have you. They’re meeting in the fellowship hall at the church at noon.” He wagged his eyebrows at her. “I seem to remember you singing at church when we were kids, and I hear they’re looking for a soprano.”

  “I do enjoy singing. It’s been a while though,” she said in a soft voice.

  So many things had been watered down over the years due to Sam’s problems. She had distanced herself from her church community due to the shame she’d felt after his death. How could she have walked into church after all the media attention and finger-pointing?

  And she knew she hadn’t really grieved Sam in the proper way. Her anger and shock and embarrassment hadn’t allowed her to fully mourn the man she’d loved but hadn’t ever really known.

  “I imagine it’s like riding a sled down a mountain.” Finn’s eyes twinkled as he mentioned their favorite childhood pastime. “Something you never quite forget how to do.”

  Finn was right. She loved singing, especially in a group setting. Why had she given up something that gave her so much joy and brought her closer to God?

  A sheepish feeling swept over her. Why was she feeling so reluctant to make friends in Love? She had been excited about making those connections, but now she felt nervous. There had been so much rejection back in Boston. Maggie almost felt wary of opening herself up to being hurt again by judgment and derision. It had been an incredibly painful experience to be shunned.

  “Are you sure you can hold down the fort by yourself?” she asked. A part of her wanted him to tell her he couldn’t handle dealing with the store by himself. That would give her a way out. Truthfully, the shop had become something of a cocoon for her. She spent all of her days at Keepsakes and her evenings were occupied by Oliver.

  “I can definitely handle it, Mags. As they say, Rome wasn’t built in a day. We’re making great progress here. This place is starting to look terrific. Take a moment to stop and smell the forget-me-nots.” Forget-me-nots were the official state flower of Alaska.

  Although Finn’s voice had a teasing tone, Maggie could sense he was serious. It hit her all at once. Finn cared about her. Despite all the years of separation, he still wanted the best for her. It made her feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

  “Okay. Why not? I’m going to go meet up with the choral group.” She sat down on a chair and pulled on her warm, fuzzy boots. She had splurged yesterday and bought a pair of Hazel’s Alaskan Lovely boots. Maggie wasn’t used to having new things. For so long she’d scrimped and saved to try to keep a roof over her family’s heads and to see to Oliver’s needs. Now, with this inheritance, she didn’t have to constantly worry about every dime. She had even purchased a few items to put under the tree for Oliver. She couldn’t wait to see the look on her son’s face when he unwrapped the toboggan.

  Finn nodded his approval. “Have a good time. I’ll meet Oliver at the bus stop. No worries.”

  Maggie put her coat and hat on, then reached in her purse for her mittens. “I’ll see you later.” Strangely enough she felt like a child venturing out into the big bad world all by her lonesome.

  “Hold on a minute,” Finn called out. He walked up to her and reached out to zip up her jacket so her neck wasn’t exposed. She looked up into his sea green eyes. “There. It’s cold out there. We wouldn’t want you to get sick.” They locked gazes, and Finn smiled. Maggie felt the oddest sensation as she gazed into Finn’s eyes. Butterflies soared in her belly. For a second she felt her palms moisten.

  She shook off the feeling. Maybe she was coming down with something. Maggie gave herself a mental pep talk and headed toward the back entrance to Keepsakes. She turned around and waved at Finn, who was standing there staring at her as if she was a baby chick leaving the nest.

  Step out of your comfort zone. Believe in yourself! Nothing ventured, nothing gained. She repeated these phrases in her head as she pushed open the back door and headed out into the wintry morning.

  Although Maggie was trying to be brave, a part of her wanted to turn right back around and hide herself away in the shop. But she knew Finn wouldn’t let her get away with it. And the truth was, she didn’t want to disappoint him.

  * * *

  Finn didn’t quite know what to do with himself while Maggie was gone. Although he kept himself busy hauling things outside to the back of the shop and doing a little online research about pricing for items, his mind kept wandering to Maggie. Was she having a good time with the choir? Had they welcomed her with open arms?

  Maggie had looked so unsure of herself and nervous. He’d been torn between encouraging her and protecting her. He didn’t remember her being so anxious. But they’d been ten years old. So much had happened in both of their lives since then.

  By the time Oliver got off the school bus, Maggie still hadn’t returned from her choir meeting. Oliver almost chatted his ear off, telling Finn stories about his kindergarten buddies and their antics. Finn loved seeing the boy’s excitement and the innocent way in which he viewed the world around him. He felt a sudden need to make sure Oliver didn’t lose his sense of wonder. Finn wanted to wrap a protective blanket around the kid so he wouldn’t get jaded or hurt by life.

  Stop it! You’re not his father, he chided himself. It’s not your job to worry about Oliver. He has a mother, and no doubt he’ll have a father soon.

  Operation Love tended to work pretty fast in Finn’s estimation. Before too long Maggie would be paired up with one of the numerous men who’d signed up for the matchmaking program. Finn shouldn’t feel annoyed about it, but he did. It was silly. Just because he’d decided not to enroll in the program didn’t mean Maggie couldn’t make the most of it. And if she did get married, they could still be friends. Somehow that thought didn’t do anything to make him feel any better.

  Maggie and Oliver were top-notch. He let out a sigh. A man would have to be a fool not to see it.

  Lord, please let Maggie find what she’s looking for here in Love. If she somehow finds it through the Operation Love program, then so be it. I know Oliver wants a father, but I want Maggie to find her own happiness. She’s been through a lot.

  The door to the shop swung open and Maggie came bustling in, carrying a plastic tin. Oliver ran toward her and hugged her tightly around the waist.

  “What a nice greeting. Seems like you missed me,” Maggie said.

  Oliver nodded and pressed his face against her. “Did you bring something for me?” Oliver asked, sniffing the tin.

  “I brought some monkey bread. It’s delicious,” Maggie said. “You’re going to love it.”

  “So, don’t keep us in suspense. How was it?” Finn asked. He’d been on pins and needles since she’d left.

  The smile on Maggie’s face threatened to overtake her entire face. “It was a lot of fun. I’m sorry I took so long, but I went for a hot chocolate with Ruby and some other ladies.”

  A sense of relief flooded him. “That’s great. Who did you hang out with?”


  She scrunched up her face. “Let’s see. There was Paige and Grace and a Gretchen. I like them all a lot. And it felt so good to sing again.”

  “That’s some fine company you were keeping. Those ladies are wonderful.”

  Oliver tugged at Maggie’s sleeve. “Mom, you said we could go get the tree tonight. Remember?” The look on Oliver’s face was hesitant, as if he was bracing for Maggie to say she’d forgotten all about it.

  “Of course I do,” Maggie said. She leaned down and pressed a kiss on Oliver’s temple. “I’ve been looking forward to it all day.”

  “Mom, you’re getting mushy again,” Oliver said, dramatically swiping his hand across his forehead.

  “Does tonight still work for you, Finn?” Maggie asked.

  “It sure does,” he said. “Why don’t we grab something to eat across the street then head over to the town green? It’s pizza night at the Moose Café. They’ll be making ten different types of pizza. You name it. Pineapple pizza. Meatball pizza. Reindeer pizza. And the always popular, Heart of Love pizza. It has five kinds of cheese and it is literally the most delicious thing I’ve ever tasted in my life.” Finn rubbed his stomach and made a funny face, much to Oliver’s delight.

  “Sounds like an artery-clogging experience,” Maggie said, chuckling behind her hand.

  “I know you love pizza,” Finn said, shooting her a knowing look. “Come on. Admit it. You’re going to have five slices of the artery-clogging, five-cheese pizza.”

  Oliver began giggling. “She usually just has two.”

  “Just you wait and see,” Finn said with a wink. “She’s going to devour this pizza.”

  “Can we go now?” Oliver asked, rubbing his stomach.

  “Let me just make sure all of these boxes have been broken down and then we can head over,” Finn said, his eyes scanning the shop. “I can’t believe how good the place looks.”