Guarding Her Heart (Guardians Inc. Book 1) Page 12
She looked at him with trepidation, unwilling to believe just yet her ordeal was over. He looked back at her, flashing her an optimistic smile that spoke volumes.
She let out a deeply held breath. “It's over, right?” she asked with a hopeful smile.
“Officially, there are still a lot of i's to dot, Marissa, but unofficially I think your nightmare may be coming to an end.”
With a look of gratitude, she threw herself into his chest and snuggled against him. He felt a strong tug on his heart as she burrowed her head against him as the realization began to sink in that her nightmare was over. He reached up and caressed her hair, running his fingers through the still wet, curly strands. For the first time since the night of the shooting, Marissa seemed at peace.
“Thank you, Matt,” she said in a voice laced with emotion. “You've done so much for me since this whole thing started. I don't think I've ever properly thanked you. Taking me into your home, feeding me, keeping me in one piece. You put your whole life on hold to keep me safe from harm. In a million years I could never find a way to repay you.”
“No repayment needed. I was doing my job, Marissa.” What he didn't tell her was that at some point it had become much more than a job. Protecting her had become as vital to him as his own heart beating within his chest. Somewhere along the way she'd become important to him. Marissa was etched on his heart. She was a part of him now, embedded in his heart and soul like a permanent tattoo. Separate and apart from his duties as Sheriff he'd wanted to keep her safe from harm because the thought of losing her was too painful to bear.
After getting dressed and gathering up their belongings they headed back along the trail to where Matt's car was parked. Just as they reached the car a beat up orange van came barreling towards them, its tires spewing dust as it ground to a halt. Ruby hopped out of the driver's seat and came rushing towards them, words tumbling out of her mouth before she even reached their side.
“Matt, we need to talk. I'm so sorry you were blindsided like that at the clinic. I should've told you before -.”
He held up a hand to ward off her long-winded apology. “I've got to head back to town, Ruby. I don't have time for this right now.”
“You can't keep running away from this,” she said with a frown.
“I'm not running,” he said with a grimace. “We will talk about this...some other time. The two us. You and me. Not Kohana.”
“Matt, he's your father,” Ruby said with a hint of censure in her voice.
“No, Ruby,” he said, “he's your father. He was never much of father to me. I know that’s not what you want to hear, but it's the truth. My truth,” he said forcefully.
“He did things,” he said as he clenched and unclenched his jaw, “unspeakable things I can't ever forget. And because of his reckless, selfish actions I lost my mother.”
Ruby shut her eyes tightly and shook her head. “I'm sorry, Matt. I know what you've lost, how much you suffered after your Mom died.” Sobs wracked Ruby's petite frame and Matt moved towards her, wrapping her up in his large arms and comforting her.
“I just wanted us to be a family,” she sobbed.
“You'll always be my family, Ruby Red,” he said, planting a kiss on her forehead. As Matt comforted Ruby he noticed for the first time that Marissa had tears streaming down her face. He made eye contact with her, trying without words to comfort her, to show her he wasn't in any way broken by his run in with Kohana and his disagreement with his sister. Marissa smiled back at him, a tender, sweet smile that made his heart soar. His heart lurched painfully in his chest and his head felt a little cloudy as if he couldn't think straight. If it hadn't already been painfully obvious to him, he knew for sure now he was head over heels in love. She'd come crashing into his life and stolen his heart like a thief in the night. And he'd never been more scared to death in his life.
Chapter Eleven
On the way back to his house after a quick stop at the sheriff’s office, they listened to music softly playing on the radio. Considering he’d come face-to-face with his father at the reservation, Matt’s mood was on a fairly even keel. He knew the time had come to put his painful past behind him. He knew instinctively that Marissa’s steady presence had everything to do with his ability to face down the ghosts of the past.
Whatever his father had done in the past had little or nothing to do with him. One of his favorite verses from Ezekiel washed over him. The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father.
“Your sister really is quite lovely,” Marissa said, interrupting his thoughts.
“She is,” Matt agreed with a nod, taking his gaze off the road for a second to observe his passenger. She had a slight grin on her face. A tightening sensation spread across his chest. It was nice to see her content despite the madness swirling around her.
They began engaging in conversation. Matt took the opportunity to ask her a personal question, one he’d been dying to ask.
“When was the last time there was someone special in your life?” he asked in a gruff voice. He knew it sounded like he was fishing, but he couldn't help himself from feeling jealous over the men in Marissa's life. Past, present, future. It didn't matter to him. He hated them all. And although it killed him to ask the question, curiosity got the better of him.
“It's been a while. I was dating this guy named Chase last year and for a while there I thought he was pretty special.” Marissa crinkled her nose as if she'd just smelled something foul. “Until I found out he was seeing a few other women in town at the same time.”
Matt felt his face drop. “Chase? Chase Brown?”
“Yup. The one and only,” she said dryly.
Aargh! Of course she was involved with him. Chase made it his business to date every good looking woman in Briarwood. He was a player and an opportunist, not to mention a liar. Heat suffused his face as he attempted to get a grip on his out of control emotions. Chase Brown? Seriously?
He kept his mouth shut, not wanting Marissa to think he was judging her.
She turned toward him. “And you? Anyone special?”
“There hasn't been anyone special.” Not until you came along.
She looked at him with a skeptical expression, her mouth puckered and her eyes boring a hole straight through him.
“What's that look for?” he asked with a raised brow.
“Nothing. It's just that I heard you were seeing someone in town. And I wasn't gossiping about you, Matt,” she quickly added. “Someone happened to mention you were seeing Grace Wheeler.”
“I'm going to strangle Beau!” he growled.
“What? I never said a word about Beau,” she said, her face a mask of innocence.
“Grace and I were never dating,” he said emphatically.
“So you were...what exactly?”
“I guess you could say we were keeping each other company.” He winced. He sounded like an idiot.
“Oh,” Marissa said softly. Her eyes lowered and she was no longer looking in his direction. She crossed her arms across her chest, and to him she looked incredibly vulnerable. Just at that moment he pulled in to his driveway. He abruptly stopped the car and turned toward Marissa.
“Marissa, look at me.”
She turned her head to look at him, her eyes looking suspiciously moist.
“What Grace and I had was...it was nothing.”
“You don't owe me an explanation,” she said briskly. “I have no right to even ask.”
He reached out and grazed her cheek with his knuckles. “I want to explain. I've never...I'm not used to having relationships where my heart was involved. Grace was someone I took out on the town from time to time. My heart was never invested. Being with you, it's different than any other woman I've been involved with. I can’t put it into words but it’s powerful. Please believe that.”
He leaned in and kissed her, his lips moving over hers in a tender, powerful kiss. He needed to show her with his actions what he wasn't
able to say yet with words. Putting his feelings into words wasn't easy for him. He’d never really learned how. Kissing her came naturally, and for now he hoped it was enough to show her how important she was to him.
Please Lord. Don’t let me mess this up, he prayed. She kissed him back with equal measure, showing him that she too felt something real between them. He reached out and grasped her head in his hands, anchoring her as close as possible to him.
More than anything, Matt wanted Marissa to understand that although he was attracted to her, he would never push for anything physical with her. He knew she was a keeper. God had placed her in his orbit for a reason.
What they shared was different from any other relationship he'd ever known, and he was determined to do this right. He’d made mistakes in his past by being intimate with women. Each and every time he’d felt guilty and ashamed. And once he’d accepted Jesus as his Lord and Savior, Matt had changed his ways. He wasn’t proud of his past, but he knew walking that path had transformed him into the man he was today. A man who made mistakes from time to time, but was committing to living his life in faith. As a result, what he wanted from Marissa was something he'd never dreamed of with any other woman. He wanted a lifetime
Matt put the car back in drive and proceeded down his driveway, putting the car in Park once he came close to the house.
“Ready to get out?” Matt asked.
Marissa nodded. “Yes. I should pack up my things. Now that the case has been solved, I should be getting back to my house and getting out of your hair.”
Matt winced once he heard her words. She was right. The case was solved. She was in the clear. Nobody was coming after her anymore. He felt his heart constrict. Having Marissa living in his house had been more of a Godsend than he had ever imagined. He had no idea of how he was going to deal with going back to living by his lonesome.
***
“Comfy?” Matt asked as he placed a warm quilt on top of Marissa.
“Very comfy,” Marissa said as she snuggled beneath the quilt, rubbing her legs together to bring more warmth to her chilled bones. The bath had been an amazing treat, but once she'd gotten out of the tub she'd gotten the chills. As soon as she shivered, Matt had ordered her to bed in her pjs.
“It's been quite a day,” Matt announced, his eyes looking weary as he tucked her into the bed as if she were a child. She felt a pang of guilt as she looked at him. Finally, he was showing the stress and the strain of the past week. Was he tired of watching over her? Drained from all the responsibility of keeping her out of a killer's grasp? Or was he simply eager to get his life and home back?
She couldn't blame him for feeling that way, if she was being honest with herself. She'd been a pain in the butt, especially in the beginning. She'd resisted him at every turn – in the hospital room when he'd announced she was coming to live with him, at her house when he'd read Tony the riot act and when he'd invited her to Sunday dinner at Aurelia's. Each and every time he'd been patient with her, promising to keep her safe no matter how much she fought him along the way.
“An eventful day,” she said as she thought about everything that went down earlier.
After leaving the Reservation they'd headed straight to the Sheriff's office so Matt could look over the forensics report on the gun found next to Cree's Body. He'd also looked at photos of the death scene, read the note Cree left behind, taken a look at the initial autopsy report and interviews with members of Cree's family. According to Matt, everything had been in order, other than a latent print found on the gun for which he'd ordered a series of forensic tests. She had no idea what a latent print was, but from what she'd overheard sitting in the Sheriff's office, it was part of Matt's tying up loose ends in the investigation.
And now, according to Matt and the Briarwood's Sheriff's Department, she was a free woman. Starting tomorrow she would be released from Matt's custody and able to move back to her yellow Victorian. She'd be able to return to her place of business and stop her staff members from gossiping about her disappearing act. Strangely enough, she wasn't feeling motivated to celebrate her freedom. Leaving Matt's house would essentially be leaving Matt and everything they'd shared during the past few weeks. If anyone had told her a few weeks ago that she would bond on an intimate level with Matt Cruz, she would've called them a liar to their face. But, in a short period of time, she'd managed to fall head over heels in love with the bravest, most generous man on the planet.
“Anything else you need?” Matt asked as he handed her a piping hot cup of Green tea.
“Are you kidding? You're spoiling me like crazy. Next thing you know you’ll be painting my nails.”
A panicked look crossed his face. “Uh, I don't have any nail polish. But I guess I could run out and buy some.”
Her heart lurched wildly in her chest at Matt's generosity. “I wasn't hinting that you should do that. I was just making the point that you've already treated me like a Queen. And I appreciate it,” she said with a tender smile.
Matt fidgeted a little, shifting his weight from one leg to the other. “You must be tired.”
She cocked her head to the side, trying to figure out what was going on with Matt. He seemed a bit off-kilter. “Not really. I'm actually wide awake.”
“Need anything before I head to bed?”
She bit her lip. Words tumbled off her lips. “The only thing I need is you, Matt.”
Woosh. She'd really gone out on a limb by saying those words. So far she'd been the only one who'd voice her true feelings. She'd told him she loved him. Although he'd told her she was in his heart, he still hadn't said those three little words. Now, once again she was out there on her own, putting it all on the table. It made her feel incredibly vulnerable.
He shifted from one foot to another. “Marissa -,” he said, words seeming to elude him as he searched for something to say.
“I know everything is going to come to a crashing halt tomorrow. It’s as if we’ve been living in this big bubble and it’s about to burst.”
Matt shook his head. “No! It’s not. We’re not coming to an end. Everything between us isn’t coming to a halt.”
She felt her heart cracking wide open upon hearing his words. “It's not?” she asked.
“No, it's not. I want much, much more for the two of us.” He lowered his head to her neck, his lips roaming across her cheeks and neck, placing tender kisses on her flesh. “More than I ever thought I'd want with anyone.”
“Tonight is our last night together. I'm going home tomorrow,” she said, her voice sounding mournful to her own ears.
He caressed her lips with his thumb, his eyes intense as he gazed into hers. “No, baby. It's not our last night together. We're just getting started.”
“Can we do something a little wild and crazy?” Marissa asked, feeling mischievous.
Matt raised his eyebrow. “Such as?”
“Can we stay up and watch movies and eat popcorn until we fall asleep?” Marissa asked, her hands crossed prayerfully in front of her.
“I think that can be arranged,” Matt said. “You’ve got me wrapped around your little finger.
“Yay!” Marissa said, jumping up and doing a little celebratory jig. When she looked over at Matt her heart lurched a little bit at the look of utter happiness etched on his face.
Thank you Lord. For sweet surprises like Matt Cruz.
***
“Shouldn't you be on bed rest?” The moment Matt laid eyes on Beau he'd known his deputy should still be at Trinity Hospital eating slimy jello and flirting with curvaceous nurses. Although it didn't surprise him to see Beau back at work so soon after the attack, he wasn't so sure it was a good idea. He was looking a little rough around the edges, with dark shadows under his eyes and a huge bandage on the back of his head. Not that he'd do things any differently himself, Matt grudgingly admitted. Beau was a lot like him, particularly in the area of work ethic.
Beau smiled weakly as he handed the manila file to Matt. He winced slight
ly as he turned to the side, his features more drawn than usual. “I'm good, Sheriff. The ribs are still a little tender, but I'm good.”
“When you're fully recuperated we need to go over a few procedural points.” Matt stared down his deputy, his eyes full of reproach and a hint of disappointment. “Donuts. Really, Beau...donuts?”
Beau nervously fidgeted with his collar, the color in his wan face rising under his boss’s scrutiny. “Don't blame Evie. The donuts were my idea. She didn't ditch me on that stakeout. Truth be told, I wanted to get rid of her.”
Matt raised a questioning eyebrow, his face reflecting his curiosity and surprise at what he'd just heard. He let out a low whistle that sounded like a boiling kettle. “That's a pretty cold thing to say about your partner.”
“C'mon, Sheriff. You know what she's like. Bossy. Opinionated. She always takes charge, no matter what. She's like a bull in a China closet. Sometimes I want to be the one calling the shots. There's no give and take with Evie. She has more testosterone than most of the male deputies, myself included.”
Matt winced. “Ouch. That's pretty harsh, Beau. She's a good deputy. She knows her stuff and she's someone you want to have your back in a crisis. She’s loyal.”
Beau let out a mournful groan. “I know she's a good deputy, but she gets on my nerves. All those goo-goo eyes and stares...I feel like she's constantly watching me. I feel like a piece of filet mignon she can't wait to bite into.”
Matt let out a hearty laugh at the thought of Evie taking a big bite out of Beau. “So I guess it's safe to say you and Evie aren't in love or anything?”
Beau let out a hoot of laughter. “In love? With Evie? Seriously, Matt, can you picture me trying to get romantic with her. She'd be barking out directions and telling me how to kiss her and for how many seconds.”
A sharp intake of breath caught them both off guard, and as they turned their heads towards the door Evie was suddenly standing at the threshold. Her face was drained of it's normal, robust color and she had a stunned expression on her face. She held two cups of coffee in hands that were trembling. For a moment she did nothing more than stand there, her eyes full of accusation and disgust. She marched stiffly over to Matt's desk, then deposited the coffee mugs on the edge with a clatter.