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An Alaskan Christmas Page 10
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Page 10
Maggie folded her arms across her chest and looked around her. “No, Finn. It looks great. I’m astounded by how nicely everything is shaping up. I think tomorrow I’m going to get started on the window display.”
After a delicious pizza dinner at the Moose Café, Finn walked over to the town green with Oliver. Maggie drove her car down Jarvis Street and found a spot close to the tree stand in case they found a tree and needed to strap it on top to take it home.
Powdery snow was falling all around them. Oliver was running around with his head tilted back so he could catch snowflakes in his mouth. It was like a beautiful postcard of an Alaskan Christmas scene. Being here with Maggie and Oliver felt like a sweet privilege.
Thank You, Lord, for this beautiful moment. I’d almost forgotten the simple joy of looking for the perfect Christmas tree.
It had been far too long since Finn had participated in such a heartwarming outing. For far too many Christmases he had been roaming around the United States, far away from his hometown. He’d missed out on a lot of moments. This year would be very different. He was going to soak up as much as he could of the holiday festivities here in Love. And he was going to live in the moment and enjoy every single second of it.
There was a multitude of Christmas trees lined up in rows. Trees of all shapes and sizes. Finn inhaled deeply. The scent was one of his favorites. It brought to mind everything he loved about the season.
“See anything you like?” Finn asked Oliver.
When Oliver reached up and grabbed hold of his hand, a funny sensation spread across Finn’s chest. It was such a simple thing, yet it made him feel like a rock star. He couldn’t deny the raw emotions it brought up inside him. Suddenly, someone needed him. Was this what it felt like to be a father? If so, it was incredible. Oliver made him realize that he wasn’t such a black sheep after all. He may have messed up a bunch of times, but in Oliver’s eyes, he was still a pretty good guy. And that meant the world to Finn.
As they walked from tree to tree, Finn found his gaze straying to Maggie. Her tender interactions with Oliver demonstrated her loving nature. She was a wonderful mother. Every child should be so grateful as to have a mother like Maggie.
Joy hummed and pulsed in the air. Everything felt pure and serene. If there was such a thing as a perfect moment in time, Finn knew this was it.
Oliver began jumping up and down. He was pointing at a medium-sized pine tree. “Hey, guys. Isn’t that a great tree?”
In Finn’s opinion it looked a bit lopsided, but he wasn’t going to put a damper on Oliver’s enthusiasm. If he wanted this slightly imperfect tree, then so be it.
Finn reached out and wrapped his hand around the base and then shook it. “It seems really solid.”
“This is it!” Oliver said. “That’s our tree.”
“Are you sure?” Maggie asked. “Once we buy it and strap it to the top of the car, that’s it. We’re not coming back for another one.”
“I’m absolutely one million percent sure,” Oliver said, his expression solemn.
“Well, it doesn’t get any better than that,” Finn said, sharing a bemused look with Maggie. “Let’s buy it.”
Maggie began to dig around in her purse. Finn reached out and placed a gentle hand on her wrist. “The tree is on me. Consider it my welcome-to-Love gift to you and Oliver.”
“That’s not necessary, Finn. You’re already doing so much to help out our family.”
“Maggie, let me do this. Trust me. Tobias’s inheritance is going to change my life in unimaginable ways.” He ran a hand over his face. “I’m not sure I’ve wrapped my head around Tobias’s generosity.”
Maggie nodded. “I know the feeling. Oliver and I have been so incredibly blessed. Not only by Uncle Tobias, but by your friendship and the generosity of the people here in town. Jasper. Hazel. Ruby. This town really is something special.”
Finn walked away from Oliver and Maggie, making his way toward the tent so he could purchase Oliver’s tree.
“Hey, Al. I think we’ve decided on a tree,” Finn said, greeting Alan Pendergast, the owner of the tree stand. He reached out and handed Al a wad of cash.
“Hey, Finn. Good to see you. Which tree are you looking at buying?”
Finn turned around and pointed toward Maggie and Oliver. “The one right there beside the woman and the little boy.”
Al nodded. “So is that Tobias’s niece?”
“Yes, that’s Maggie,” Finn said. “And her son, Oliver. They’re living out at Tobias’s place.”
Al let out a laugh. “I remember her as a little tyke. Tobias sure loved that girl.”
Finn nodded. Tobias had been a devoted uncle to Maggie, even though a huge geographical distance separated them. He couldn’t count the number of times Tobias had pulled out photos and letters from Maggie. Finn always had the impression Tobias viewed Maggie as his honorary daughter.
“He sure did,” Finn acknowledged. “She’s going to do him proud by running Keepsakes and carrying on his legacy here in Love.”
Al jerked his head in the direction of Maggie and Oliver. “Who’s the guy standing with them?” Al let out a chuckle. “You can’t even turn your back in this town without someone trying to steal your lady.”
Finn quickly turned around. From this distance he couldn’t be certain, but it looked like Hank Jeffries had sidled up to Maggie in his absence. He had his palm up waiting for Oliver to give him a high five. Finn recognized his height and broad shoulders, as well as the red-and-black lumberjack coat he always wore. A feeling of irritation washed over him. Hank was a fireman. Ladies loved firemen, although for some inexplicable reason, Hank was still single and available. And according to the rumor mill, he was looking to settle down.
Finn clenched his teeth. Hank was well regarded and a genuinely nice guy. It wasn’t any of his business who courted Maggie or tried to make friends with Oliver. After all, hadn’t Oliver spilled the beans about wanting to find a father in Love? Hank would fit the bill just fine, he imagined. He was heroic and strong and he didn’t run away when things became too overwhelming.
Finn turned his back on the sight of Maggie, Hank and Oliver. The sudden appearance of Hank reminded him of his own unworthiness. He felt like a deflated balloon. Maggie and Hank made sense. He was the very definition of reliable. Steadfast. No doubt the whole town of Love would cheer them on.
“She’s not my lady,” he said in a curt voice to Al.
“Really? The two of you aren’t the latest couple from Jasper’s program?” Al asked, his brow furrowed in confusion.
For some reason, Al’s question pricked at Finn. This whole evening had felt idyllic until reality had slapped him in the face. Hank’s sudden appearance had been a jolt to the system, serving to remind him in no uncertain terms of his own inadequacy. He wasn’t the type of man who could give Maggie and Oliver what they truly needed and deserved—stability.
“We’re not dating,” Finn snapped. “Maybe I should put a sticky note on my forehead saying we’re just friends.”
Al held up his hands. “Okay. I didn’t mean to get you all riled up. It’s just that you three look like a family. And Declan settled down last year. Figured you might want to follow his lead.”
He blew out a frustrated breath. “How many times do I have to tell everyone in this town? I’m not interested in Operation Love or getting married or starting a family. I don’t want to be a father or a husband. I’m doing perfectly fine all by myself.”
The moment the words tumbled off his tongue, Finn felt like a jerk. Al’s hurt expression spoke volumes. Once again, Finn O’Rourke had messed up.
As Finn turned around to leave, he met Maggie’s shocked gaze. She was standing directly behind him with wide eyes. He felt a sinking sensation in the pit of his stomach. There was no question about it. Maggie had overheard
his rant.
He let out a ragged sigh. So much for their perfect evening.
Chapter Eight
Maggie’s cheeks felt flushed as she stood awkwardly in the entranceway to the tent. Maggie had never heard such anger in Finn’s voice. It had surprised her. For the most part, he always seemed so upbeat and content. And this evening had been so idyllic up to this point.
A thick tension hung in the air. She had no idea what to say to fill up the silence.
She’d been standing with Oliver when Hank Jeffries had come over and introduced himself to them. It had quickly become clear he had a romantic interest in her. Although he was handsome and friendly, Maggie had felt slightly uncomfortable. She’d been out of the dating game for quite some time. Even before she’d met Sam, Maggie had always felt awkward about dating. Clearly, nothing had changed.
On the pretext of asking Finn a question about the tree, Maggie had beat a fast path toward the tent. In the process, she’d stumbled upon a very revealing conversation.
Finn stood by silently, seemingly speechless.
“You must be Maggie.” The older man came toward her and stuck out his hand. “I’m Al Pendergast. This is my Christmas tree stand. You probably don’t remember me, but your uncle was a dear friend of mine. I met you once or twice when you were knee-high to a grasshopper.”
Maggie shook his hand and shot him a shaky smile. “It’s a pleasure to meet you again. You’ve got some beautiful trees here. My son is delighted.”
“You sure know how to make an old man smile. I pride myself on top-quality Christmas trees.” Al grinned. “Why don’t we head back over to the trees and I’ll wrap it up for you?”
As they walked back toward Oliver and the tree, Maggie couldn’t help but notice Hank had disappeared. She felt a twinge of guilt about not being more receptive to him, but he’d caught her off guard. She probably didn’t have to worry about him asking her out. She’d acted like a skittish newborn colt.
Mr. Pendergast placed the tree in a machine that wrapped it up in netting. Finn easily picked up the tree and strapped it to the top of Maggie’s car.
“I’ll follow behind the two of you in my car,” Finn said. He’d barely said two words since she had surprised him in the tent. Maggie wasn’t sure if he was embarrassed or annoyed with her for overhearing him. Either way, it felt awkward.
“Can I go in Finn’s car?” Oliver asked, crossing his hands prayerfully in front of him.
Maggie tugged at his sleeve. “No, Oliver,” she said in a sharp voice. “You’re driving with me.”
Ignoring her son’s pout, Maggie got in the driver’s seat and revved the engine. Oliver was becoming entirely too enamored with Finn. Perhaps she needed to sit him down for a little talk about their friendship. Oliver wasn’t shy about telling her he wanted her to find him a forever father. It wasn’t too much of a leap for Oliver to imagine Finn in that role.
Lord, please protect my son. His heart is as wide and open as the great outdoors. I don’t want him to get his feelings hurt. He’s already been through so much.
As she drove home, Finn’s words played back in her mind. I’m doing perfectly fine all by myself.
Maggie didn’t know why it bothered her so much to have overheard Finn’s harsh-sounding words directed at Mr. Pendergast. It wasn’t any of her business if he wasn’t a proponent of the town mayor’s matchmaking program. To be honest, neither was she. So what if he didn’t want a wife and kids? It really didn’t concern her. Finn was her friend, not a prospective mate. Because she felt so comfortable around him and she knew Oliver loved him, Maggie had allowed Finn a place in her life that wasn’t strictly in the friendship zone.
If she was being really honest with herself, there was chemistry between her and Finn. The extensive amount of time she’d been spending in Finn’s company had created a bond between them. But Maggie wasn’t looking for love. She was seeking stability and a solid foundation. Although Oliver wanted a father, Maggie didn’t need a man to help her give Oliver a bright future. She was fully capable of doing it on her own.
Finn had made things crystal clear about his wants and needs. He didn’t need to spell it out any further. Finn liked having a solitary life. And he wasn’t interested in changing. For the first time Maggie realized Finn had layers like an onion. On the surface he was jovial and full of zest, but underneath he was struggling with something. Maggie was certain of it. She knew from her own experience what it looked like when a person was keeping secrets.
Maggie had her own problems to deal with as a single mother making a new life for herself. Although Finn was a good friend, it wasn’t her place to try to solve his issues. She already had her hands full trying to make sure Oliver was healthy and happy. The wounds from Sam’s death were still so fresh.
When they arrived home, Finn carried the tree into the house, with a little assistance from Oliver. Maggie couldn’t help but smile at the sight of her son carrying the tail end of the tree. He really wanted to be a mini version of Finn.
Once inside the house, Maggie directed Finn and Oliver toward the living room. Finn placed the tree in the tree stand right in front of their big bay window. She knew it would look spectacular when it was fully decked out with ornaments, lights and a shiny gold star on top. She could imagine it all, including gaily wrapped presents sitting under the tree.
“Thanks for helping us pick a tree, Finn,” Oliver said with a wide grin. “And you were right. You are the best tree hunter in town. Maybe in all of Alaska.”
“Thanks, kiddo,” Finn said. “It was a real honor to be asked to join you and your mother. Finding the perfect Christmas tree is epic. You made my day!”
“You made mine too. It wouldn’t have been half as fun without you.” Oliver looked up at him. “I know you’re super busy, but I really want to go flying with you.”
The wistful tone in Oliver’s voice made Maggie weak in the knees. One word from Finn and her son would be crushed. She found herself holding her breath. Please, Finn, she prayed. Don’t break his heart.
“We can go on Saturday morning, bright and early.” He locked gazes with Maggie. “Does that sound all right?”
There was no way in the world Maggie could say no, even if she’d wanted to. Oliver was looking at her with an expression of such hope shining forth in his eyes. “Sounds like a plan. I’ll head into the store and set up the window display while you boys have your adventure.”
Oliver let out a roar of approval. “This is the best day ever!” he yelled.
“I think it’s time to head upstairs so you can get ready for a bath and bedtime. Say good-night to Finn,” Maggie instructed.
“’Night, Finn,” Oliver said, looking up at him with a shy expression etched on his face.
“See you later, gator,” Finn said, tousling Oliver’s hair.
“In a while, crocodile,” Oliver shouted out as he raced toward the stairs.
Once they were alone, Finn walked over toward her. His hands were stuffed in his pockets and he had a sheepish expression etched on his face.
“About what you overheard back there at the tree stand,” Finn began. “I don’t want you to think I’m against people finding love or anything. I think it’s great. And I’m not against Jasper’s program. It’s just not for me.”
Maggie held up her hands. “You don’t need to explain anything to me. I hope you don’t think I would judge you for your opinions.”
Finn quirked his mouth. “Maggie, I’m a single guy in a town full of bachelors who are all tripping over themselves to find a woman to settle down with.” He shook his head. “I’m a bit of an anomaly.”
“Glad to see nothing’s changed since we were kids,” Maggie teased. “You always were an outlier.”
“That’s a nice way of putting it.” Finn chuckled. “Good night, Mags. I’ll see you a
t the shop tomorrow.”
Maggie saw Finn to the door and waved as he drove off into the dark Alaskan night. As soon as she shut the door, she leaned against it and pondered the events of the last few hours. Despite the slight tension at the Christmas tree stand, it had been an enjoyable evening, full of laughter, fellowship and discoveries. Oliver had thoroughly enjoyed himself with Finn. And Maggie had felt grateful for adult companionship.
If Maggie’s past hadn’t been filled with heartache and betrayal, she might be in a position to test the waters. Based on her research, Operation Love was a resounding success. Even Finn’s own brother had found love through the program with Annie, who ran the Free Library in town. According to Ruby, Annie had come to Love in order to run the new library, then fallen in love with Declan O’Rourke, the pilot who had flown her to town. And her new friend Grace had met the sheriff of Love, Boone Prescott, through Jasper’s matchmaking program as well. The list of successful matches was quite lengthy.
She’d heard so many romantic stories about Operation Love and people finding their true north. The truth was, Maggie was no longer looking for a fairy tale. She would be content to raise Oliver in a house filled with love and faith. She’d had her one love in a lifetime. Before everything had gone so horribly wrong, she and Sam had been a love story. Over time their marriage had buckled under the strain, but they had been a love match when they’d pledged forever to one another. Despite what people said, Maggie wasn’t sure a person got two bites of the apple.
No matter how much she cared for Finn, there was no sense in hoping for something that would never happen. She and Finn actually had a similar outlook on romance. Finn was closed off to relationships and commitment. Maggie had been burned in the not-so-distant past by a husband who hadn’t been on the same page with her or the lifestyle she wanted to lead. Right before her very eyes Sam had changed. And she hadn’t been any the wiser until the bottom fell out of their world. There was no way she was going to set herself up for any more heartache. As it was, Sam’s duplicity had brought her to his knees.